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Tips to Pastoral Counselling

Title: Practicality, Not Theology
Date: 01-Aug-2004

Thirty years ago, Mr Tan Eng Beng's wife would have been referred to as Mrs. Tan Eng Beng or as Madam Lim Bee Suan, her maiden name. That was the manner by which we addressed our lady teachers then.

Today, we would call her Mrs. Tan Bee Suan or, less often, Madam Lim Bee Suan,depending on her preference. Frankly speaking, Father, dose it really matter whether a lady uses her maiden name or her husband's name? Can't each couple be allowed to sort out how they prefer to be addressed since a mere change of name by no means indicate oneness?

After much soul searching, Lord, I think this too, like many other issues, is a matter of practicality and not theology. Husbands and wives who are in the Lord are one. No amount of external changes can alter that fact. If we start from this angle, many emotionally tired wives and husbands would be put to rest over these issues of the external signs of oneness. They would be able to redirect their energy to more essential things, like understanding one another and speaking the truth in love. Agreed, Lord?

For Meditation and Prayer:

Genesis 2:21-25
Ephesians 5:21



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